Happiness is a state of mind, or so they say.
As for me, happiness is the outcome of decisions we don’t regret in this life. I, too, am a liar. No matter how I tell everyone that I am not the kind to have regrets, a part of me would still linger upon the options I did not choose.
I could name more than a hundred things I would have done differently. I could pick out many scenes from memory which I would gladly alter. But this I tell you: I always own my decisions. It is in this proud manner that I still appear pleased with life despite the many disappointments I have had.
More than a decade ago, my personal motto was a line from a Lenny Kravitz song, “It ain’t over ’till it’s over.” I just had a lot of guts when I was younger. I’ll go through each struggle with as much courage and eagerness. I just can’t be defeated. Well, it just goes to show how defiant I was. But yesterday, while struggling to face my fear while tears ran down my face and sulking the pain inside, I kept saying, “This too shall pass.” To me it simply means that struggles are irrelevant for life proceeds in its natural course leading everything to where it should be.I have grown a bit resilient.
This is also an acceptance that life is just being fair by never being fair to anyone. I work hard, mess up, get tossed around like everybody else, and in the end we are all still here, exactly where we should be.
I am looking forward. When “this” have already passed, where would I be?
As one of my closest friends would always tell me, “We just have to continue living or we’ll never find out what is there for us tomorrow.”